My Personal Story

July 1969 Apollo 11 made the historic voyage and Neil Armstrong became the first man to set foot on the moon. I was in the Army at Fort Hood, Texas and I remember feeling like not only had mankind made a mess out of the earth but now we were going to do the same with the moon. I also remember that there was a soldier from another outfit that came around that night talking to several of us as we sat on the barracks steps drinking wine and pondering the momentus event. He was carrying a Bible and talking about God like He was really interested in us. And i remember being impressed with his sincere desire to get the message across to all of us. I pocketed one of the tracts he gave us and for the next week i looked at it whenever i was sure nobody could see me, but i did not understand what it was trying to say to me.

The following Saturday i was wandering around post with no particilar place to go and found myself in front of one of the post chapels. Something moved me to go inside. The chaplain's assistant asked me what he could do for me, and i replied that i didn't know. The chaplain came out of his office and basically asked me the same question, to which i replied i didn't know but i thought he could tell me since he was a God man. He told me that he did not have time to talk with me now, but that i could make an appointment with his assistant and he would talk with me later. This really upset me and i went ballistic on him and started cursing and told him what i thought of him and his God if that's the way he was. I was sobbing out of control and i didn't know why. The Chaplain asked me into his office and calmed me down.

He explained that he did have a meeting to go to and that he was late, but that he did want to meet with me at my earliest convenience and talk with me about all that was on my mind. I told him that i only had two weeks until i was out of the Army, as my three year enlistment was up. Besides that, i really didn't want anyone to see me talking to a chaplain, and i really didn't even know what was on my mind. He asked me if it was alright for him to pray for me, and i agreed to it. We bowed our heads and he prayed for me. I have no idea what he said, but i do know that he contacted God on my behalf. When i walked out the chapel door that day my whole world changed. Everything was bright and alive and beautiful. It was as though the world had been zapped by Mr. Clean - like in those old commercials. I realized that i just had an encounter with God.

I walked around post the rest of the day hoping that nobody would stop and talk with me and interrupt this wonderful feeling of peace and joy. The next two weeks flew by and i was honorably discharged from the US Army on August 11, 1969. It took a couple months for me to get back home in upstate New York. I hitched rides and took the bus and visited places along the way from Texas to NewYork as i was in no hurry and had no plans. I had just begun to explore and try to learn more about this new way of life.

Up to that time i had not thought about life in any meaningful way. I never thought about anyone but myself. And i never thought about anything but drinking, getting high, and having a good time. When i was in VietNam i come to realize that everyone was the same, and we were all just doing what we had been taught to do. It seemed that life was futile and there was nothing to do but try to not think about it. So i just tried to keep my mind altered so i wouldn't have to think about anything that could not be understood. Who knew what to believe and who was telling the truth - if there was a truth. It seemed that all truth was relative - depending on where you were, what you were doing, and who was telling it. To me if something was true it should be true no matter where you are, what you are doing, and no matter who you are.

I wanted to find out about this truth. I began to read everything i could find about truth and seekers of truth. I studied philosophies, psychologies, and religions from Buddahism, Confucianism, Hinduism, Mysticism.and Taoism. It seemed that all ideologies have some elements of truth. And it seemed they all had similarities. One thing they all had in common was the belief that there was something called truth. And they all spoke of teachers of truth. Some called them teachers, philosophers, prophets, sages, enlightened ones, leaders, gods, seers etc. The main thing was that these all represented people who were respected for always telling the truth as they showed others the way to live. I began to realize that all the teachers mentioned Jesus as the prime example of a man of truth.

If He is the main example that they all mentioned - why not find out more about Him. My brother had introduced me to two Roman Catholic Priests when i returned from the Army. They were really good people and i started hanging around them learning about their way of life and the faith that they were embracing. I went to Lancaster, Kentucky as a volunteer for The Christian Appalachain Project. This was a volunteer organization that helped the people of Appalachia by providing food, clothing, and physical labor fixing properties in need of repair. There was a monastery we visited a short distance from there in Bardstown, Kentucky. I was very impressed with the priesthood and the monastic way of life. I wanted to become a monk so i took a catechism class for new converts to learn more about the teachings and joined the Catholic church. I wanted to enter that monastery in Bardstown, Kentucky.

The Catholic church has a rule that one has to be a member for a year prior to entering the monastic way of life. It worked out that i was asked to go live with six Marist Brothers monks in New York City. This was a community of teachers who were self supporting from their daily jobs. I took courses at City University of New York while working as a security guard to contribute to the house. While there i was reading the New Testament alot. One day i was so excited about a passage i was reading that i had to tell the others. Jesus said if we "seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness that all the things we need will be provided" (Matthew 6:33). One of the brothers was a teacher of Theology at Fordham University and had a Doctorate in Theology. He took me aside and told me that i was too idealistic and shouldn't take this literally. This really caused turmoil and confusion within me. How was i to know what to believe - how was i to know what these teachings meant. What to take literally and what to take symbolically. If i could not understand what Jesus was saying - how was i to understand anything.

My year was just about up and now i was not even sure about going into the monastery. So i did the only thing that i knew - i went back into the Army. But, during the two years time from the experience in the chapel at Fort Hood and the time spent with the religious communites i had come to have a change of heart. So i asked to be given a non-combat job classification and a duty where i would not have to carry a weapon. They gave me a battery of tests and sent me to to Stock Control and Accounting Specialist training at Fort Lee, Virginia. Everything went fine until completion of the training and graduation. We were waiting on further orders and our next assignment so we had daily duties to perform while there.

They gave me the assignment of guarding the post finance building at night. They took several of us to the Military Police station for orientation. They issued all of us rifles and ammunition and explained the gravity of the situation. We were to use the weapon if needed to protect the finances in this building. I could not bring myself to take the weapon with the chance that i may have to shoot someone with it. So i tried to explain my reluctance to the man in charge.

This caused quite a stir with everyone concerned. I was accused with failing to report for duty and for refusing an order. They took me back to my Company Commander and i was written up for a courts martial. I was sent to a JAG lawyer who questioned me extensively about the situation. He started by asking if I were a Conscientious Objector and i told him that i was not and that i did not even know what that was. He questioned me for a long time about what had happened and why i took such a position and why i was so determined to not take up that weapon. After much talking he told me that whether i thought so or not i was a Conscientious Objector and that i should apply for a discharge from military service. I had to talk with several legal people and psychiatrists as part of the process, and complete the paper work to apply for discharge. This took several months during which time orders came down for me to report to Hanau, Germany for my next assignment.

After arriving there i was assigned chaplain's assistant because of my pending application hearing. My first week in Germany a company clerk came to my room and asked me why i was applying for a conscientious objector discharge. I told him that i believe in God and that i could not take a the chance in killing another human being. He asked me what i believed about God - i was not sure exactly what i did believe. He used the New Testament to show me that Jesus was the incarnation of God and that he came to make us right with God by paying the price for our alienation. I recognized the truth of what he was saying from the catechism teachings about the GodHead and the Virgin Birth of Jesus, and His Life, Death and Resurrection from the dead. I knew who He was but did not fully realize that He is alive right now and that He really could come into our lives and transform us by His Spirit working in us. Could this be what happened at Fort Hood, Texas? Well i wanted to make sure that He was my Lord and Savior and my God so i bowed to Jesus that day in January 1972 and trusted Him.

The word became flesh and dwelt among us - - - He came to His own and His own received Him not but to as many as did receive Him He gave the power to become the children of God. - - - Unless a person is born again he cannot see the Kingdom of God. Jesus said: "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life" and "no one can come to the Father but by me" He also said that "you are my disciples" and "if you continue in my word you will know the truth and the truth will set you free". The teacher, the Holy Spirit, will come and will guide you into all truth. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.

After five months in Germany the US Army granted me another Honorable Discharge and i returned to the USA. I knew that there was much to learn about God and this new life. While working as a time keeper about seven months later i was approached by an older gentleman who worked there as he said "son why don't you go to a Bible college". I proceeded to tell him that i had been thinking about the same thing and i told him all the excuses why i could not go. And he said: "son you have to step out in faith and trust God". I went to the phone and called the school and had an interview the next day and started school the following Monday. That had to have been one of the best decisions of my life. I learned to read and trust the Bible and I met a lady there who became my wife and life's partner. We have had many wonderful experiences together. Not the least of which are two beautiful daughters who have become young ladies and have been nothing but blessings to us their entire lives.